How I'm planning my self-employed maternity leave as a second time mom

We’re officially in the 2 month countdown until baby boy arrives, and I’ve been doing a lot of planning and strategizing around how I want to approach taking leave from my business this second time around.

You can read about how I planned my first maternity leave here

What I learned from my first self employed “maternity leave” and postpartum experience

The biggest challenge I faced the first time around was simply inexperience. I was having my first baby and literally didn’t know what it would be like to be a new mom! Would I want to work less or take a break to spend more time with my baby? I assumed I wouldn’t want to put my infant in full time daycare (flexibility was the main reason I started my own business in the first place) but how much childcare would I need? How do you even find childcare? How would I make enough money to pay for all our new expenses and still take care of myself? 

All I could do was see what my friends and peers were going through as they had babies, and absorb all the advice I was getting from all sides.

The overarching message I was absorbing was “the baby years go by so fast, and you will never regret spending more time with your baby! You will want to be present and soak it all up.”

So, I didn’t really make any set-in-stone postpartum plans for childcare or work, and decided to just see what I wanted and needed after I had my baby.

Regarding my business, my life coach and spiritual mentor at the time advised me to drop everything and focus on building up my 1:1 client base because with the type of work I do, it would be possible to take client calls with a baby. 

But I completely ignored her :P and went on to attempt way too many goals, projects, and launches- ultimately spreading myself too thin and making little progress, which just compounded my stress and feelings of overwhelm.

Ah, the curse of the easily inspired multi-passionista!

THE REALITY OF MY EXPERIENCE:

After my husband went back to work (back in the pre-pandemic days when he commuted to an office), I was left all alone all day with a wailing nugget, felt completely alone, and sunk into postpartum depression with the isolation and brain numbing monotony.

Re-learning how to do basic things as a new mom like getting out of the house or driving somewhere with my baby felt completely insurmountable. 

WHAT I LEARNED

What I’ve learned through experience about crafting your own maternity leave as a solo entrepreneur can be summed up by what I’m calling “the 3 S’s:”

Support, Simplify, and Systematize!

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1. Set Up Support!

If you only do one thing to prepare your life and business for having a baby, THIS IS IT.

You are going to need so much support, and that is completely normal! It doesn’t mean you’re weak or a failure. We live in a culture (in the US) that was literally founded on freedom and independence, but the fact is that you can’t do everything on your own especially after having a baby, and you shouldn’t expect that of yourself.

Think about:

• Business support, whether that means childcare or coaching for some structure and accountability

• Postpartum support (mental and physical - think psychotherapy, pelvic floor physical therapy, lactation help if you’re breastfeeding, meal trains, who is going to clean your bathroom or teach you how to use your baby wrap or breast pump etc)

• Support for navigating the identity shifts and how your life is going to dramatically change overnight from maiden to mother (especially if it’s your first baby)

• Support with your older kids if it’s not your first baby

• Support so you can continue to prioritize 1:1 time with your partner

Last fall I hired a business coach and joined a mastermind to give myself some support and it was the best personal and business decision. I’ve already joined the next round of the mastermind so I know I’ll be supported when I come back from maternity leave later this summer. 

I know that if I try to get things done on my own, they just won’t happen and I don’t want to feel like I”m free floating in the cloudy chaos of postpartum.

On the personal side, I’m also getting established with a perinatal therapist for mental and emotional support.

I also need to acknowledge that it’s been four years since my first baby rodeo and we are fortunate to be in a completely different life situation. I’ve been intentionally creating my “village” or system of support ever since becoming a mom, and our household has privileges that many don’t.

• Ben works from home, is a true co-parent and partner, and gets 3 months of paid family leave. Yes I fully appreciate this and him!

• Thomas is now a semi-independent preschooler and will continue going to school 3 full days each week.

• We live 35 minutes from my mother in law and have made a few babysitter connections so I’ll be able to have support with the baby when I need it. 

• I’m taking midwife approved medication for my anxiety which has been helping me feel much more emotionally and mentally stable.

• And my business has been established for four more years than before! I have much more experience and clarity in what I do and my long term goals.

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2. Simplify

Over the last year I’ve been slowly letting go of extra side projects and smaller offers in my business to focus exclusively on my 1:1 coaching for the foreseeable future.

Instead of viewing having a baby as the end of life as I know it, I’m taking a longer perspective when it comes to my work (since I assume I will be doing this decades!) and thinking more in terms of a 3-5 year strategic plan vs. “how much can I accomplish in this calendar year.”

Are there programs, offerings, and group experiences I want to create and launch? Absolutely! I love bringing women together and would espeiclly love to do in-person womens circle at some point. I would love to launch a podcast and run another round of Wild Synchronicity or launch my Back to Biz with Baby group program.

AND I WILL!

Just not this year ;) 

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3. Systematize 

My loose timeline is to take 8 weeks off work, then pick back up 1:1 client calls and work a few hours a week once we feel pretty established in our routine. I’m not going to launch anything new or take on projects for the rest of the year, just continue the momentum I’ve built in the past several months. 

Intentional work I have been doing over the past 6 months to get into a flexible and realistic work flow:

• clarifying my niche, audience, and offerings

• relationship building, in person and online

• content batching

• writing a regular blog/newsletter

• honing my social media strategy

• launching a new free offer with automated emails that nurture my audience and lead into my paid coaching offer

• establishing set times and days of the week to take client calls

• creating a “content bank” of copy, posts, and emails I can send

As someone who is easily inspired and has “shiny object syndrome” and endless creative ideas, it is super super super hard for me to let go and simplify.

But I shifted my mindset.

Instead of looking at what I am missing out on or sacrificing, I’m looking at what’s most important to me right now, and giving myself lots of permission slips:

To have low energy.

To work less.

To have more time and space to prepare for the baby and enjoy spending time with my firstborn in our last weeks as a family of 3.

To make space for fun hobbies and projects like decorating our house… embroidery… sewing for fun… instead of feeling like I need to cram as many work projects into my life as possible to prep for leave.

The thing about taking a leave is that you will come back!

It’s ok to save some work for later if you don’t get everything done.

It’s ok to schedule projects, goals, and ideas out on your timeline, even years in the future.

Permission to be present in the moment.

Permission to change your mind, and change your plans if it turns out you need or want something different!

Having a baby might be the end of life as you know it, but it’s the beginning of a whole new chapter that is going to surprise, delight, and stretch you in ways you can’t even fathom right now.

You don’t have to have it all figured out. As painful as it is for me to accept this… as a Type A control freak who strives on structure and plans… maybe this is an invitation to go with the flow a little more!

When I was pregnant with my first baby, one of my biggest fears was how I would manage to continue the work I loved as a coach and creative entrepreneur while also being the present mama I wanted to be.

It felt impossible because it was all so new and I didn’t see many other people or role models living this “middle path” that’s not really being a stay at home mom, but also not being a full time working mom.

Our brains automatically go to Worst Case Scenario thinking, so we have to choose positive possibilities instead.

So I created this affirmation:

What if…

✨Having a baby is the BEST THING that could happen to my life and business✨

And honestly, it will be true if you decide to make it come true.

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I know that planning for a baby and maternity leave as a creative business owner or solo entrepreneur feels completely overwhelming, which is why I love doing my part to support women who are transitioning into motherhood or balancing your creative purpose driven work in the world with your calling to be a mom.

If you want some help brainstorming what YOU need for your maternity leave, you can click here to schedule a totally free 30 minute call with me. I’d love to help you feel more empowered, organized, and confident heading into this new exciting season!

xo Anna

Mid-year update and goal review (plus a free workbook!)

Well, here we are, well into July. 2017 is officially half over! This year is flying.

I feel like time is evaporating right in front of my eyes and if I let myself think about it late at night I start to freak out (aka last night) so I’m just trying to stay present and as grounded as possible and enjoy this season instead of trying to rush through to the next phase, because even though it's easier for me to always look at where I'm falling short or can be doing better, this season of life honestly rocks and I don’t think I’ve ever been happier. Or at least more accepting of who I am and who I'm becoming.

And it's important to celebrate what we can!

This is the time of year where the days and weeks start to blur together, in that busy/chill whirlwind. Ben is teaching summer school so our week days have been full of 12+ hour work days, hustle, froyo dates, and Netflix. Weekends are full of short getaways, relaxing at home, and doing our best to get out and enjoy summer in Chicago!

In terms of business, I’m not as far as I thought I’d be by now, but in terms of LIFE and my relationship with myself: I feel like a completely different person. Confident, excited, finding my groove.

Back in January I wrote “But I also know that I can do more and be more. I still feel like I've barely even scratched the surface of my own potential and have super huge visions and dreams for what I want to do and create.”

I made “open hearted” my word of the year and I’m still trying to embody that every day.

It's a strange season of life. Pre-kids, but post quarter life crisis.

I've done the big scary things like go to grad school, get married, move to the big city, survive unemployment, quit my job, start my own business, become a life coach, and stretch my comfort zone farther than I ever thought possible.

I'm no longer motivated or fueled by the desperate energy that comes when you feel like you aren't enough yet...when you know you have to climb onto the next rung of the ladder in order to feel like you've "made it."

I've done so much inner work to develop my self confidence and heal my insecurities, anxiety, and perfectionism, but at the same time I'm still learning what it's like to be on the other side as a (more or less) whole and mentally/emotionally healthy woman.

My mid-year update!

At the beginning of the year I decided to invest in a high-level business mastermind with a small group of other life and business coaches, which was the most money I’d ever spent on myself before outside of our wedding, but I’m so glad I did because I've gained so much.

• Confidence in who I am and what I'm here on earth to do.

• I feel like I am FINALLY exactly where I’m meant to be, instead of having that constant anxiety/FOMO feeling.

• Connection with other inspiring and driven entrepreneurs who push and pull me to do scary things, and show me that it's ok to blaze my own trail. We're all safe. No one is gonna die if we share our truth.

• Finally stepping out and establishing myself as a life coach for creative entrepreneurs who want to get out of fear and into flow.

• Lotsssss of really great online business and marketing strategies that align with my values and vision! So fun.

• Perspective. I know I've found my purpose and for the first time in my adult life can stop seeking. I'll always be learning, evolving, and growing, but I'm realizing that I'm in this for the rest of my life and there is absolutely no rush to do ALLTHETHINGS right now. I can take the deadlines and timelines off my goals and trust that if I feel aligned and just show up every day, everything will happen in the perfect timing.

• Basically I want to be the coach and support system that I WISH I had 3 years ago, 2 years ago, when I was first getting started on my entrepreneur adventure.
• I launched my first ever mini program, Fear & Flow! This was the most unexpectedly intense week, haha. Ironically given the content, it dredged up fears and insecurities I didn’t even know I had!

CONNECTION/COMMUNITY

It’s so important to surround yourself with like minded people who can support and share your goals and dreams, especially during the phases where you're feeling extra vulnerable or testing your own boundaries.

Also include people who are a few steps ahead and will pull you!

I used to be intimidated by people who were older or more experienced than me but I’m learning how to take down my walls, see us as equals but just at different points of our journey.

Stop waiting on the sidelines and watching other people do the things you really want to do too. When you dive in, raise your own pedestal, and stop letting jealousy and fear hold you back, you'll become part of the conversation as an equal.

CREATING A NEW RELATIONSHIP WITH FEAR

Read this book. Seriously. I'm going to share an entire post about it later this week, but it's completely changing my life.

Instead of letting fear (read: insecurities, doubt, anxiety) paralyze me, I'm learning how to frame these "negative" emotions in a neutral or even POSITIVE way and am turning my inner critic into my biggest cheerleader. She takes no shit, and I actually love her.

RANDOM UPDATES FROM 2017 SO FAR

(because I've been lazy about keeping the blog updated)

• I turned 30! Wow. It feels really great. Like I can stop striving and seeking and can just be ME.
• I did the Ultimate Reset, a 21 day plant based cleanse, and learned a lot about my relationship with food and my body. Still a work in progress on that front.
• I started a new health and wellness blog, Inspire Joy, as a place to share my fitness coaching business and went to Los Angeles by myself for a leadership conference!
• In June I started running again and remembered why I love it so much. I had my dad make me a training plan for the Steamboat Classic, a 4 mile race in my home town over Father’s Day weekend. It had been a couple years since we ran and it was super fun (and humid) as usual!

To be completely honest, for the past few years my business has been my number one priority. I feel like I’m reaching a point where I’ve gained so much knowledge about online marketing, entrepreneurship, coaching, branding, ETC. that I can pause the incessant addiction for e-courses and learning and finally get to a place where I can TRUST MYSELF and the wisdom that is already inside of me.

The more I learn, the more I realize we have the answers inside of us all along!

I'm starting to feel like I can actually be a leader and do this thing. Create a thriving and abundant living by simply being myself and sharing what makes me happiest. Teaching women how to get out of their own way and do it too.

ON TAP FOR THE SECOND HALF OF 2017

• Travel!! Aside for a few weekend getaways and my trip to LA, this year has been relatively low key for me and I've been in hermit mode at home, but all that is about to change and I can't wait because I love traveling. This week I'm heading to New Orleans for our Beachbody coach summit, I'm going to TN/NC in August with Ben to visit his mom, Michigan in September to host a leadership retreat for my team, and Dallas in November for my 4th annual business conference, The Platinum Edge. 
• Growing my life coaching business! There are so many ideas floating around my head. If you're interested in working together, book a free consult ASAP because my rates are only going up and I expect to be fully booked with a waitlist very soon!
• Creating more freebies and e-books to share with you!
• Sharing my creativity with the world! This has been on the back burner for a couple of years, but I am feeling the urge to start painting again.

I made this nursery art for my friend Deidre’s new baby Anna Pixley and it was SO FUN. I’m thinking of doing a whole alphabet and selling them as digital prints in the Etsy shop.

Let’s not even talk about my fabric stash…

• Up-leveling like woah. No more hiding or playing small. I feel like the last six months have been preparing me for something big. I'm ready to step out and share everything I've learned with the world! :) Time to stop planning and start turning those visions into reality instead of being intimidated by myself, lol.

Exactly one year ago I wrote this post on growing pains as you move out of your comfort zone.

I’m realizing that the growing pains never go away, because if we’re constantly challenging ourselves to grow and expand into our potential, we’re always going to be finding new edges of our comfort zone.

But it’s like running! It always feels hard, but you get faster and stronger.

That’s where I’m at right now.

Stronger, more confident, more EXCITED than scared about what I’m creating and doing with my life.

The fear never goes away, but it doesn’t really bother me anymore. I know that I am so much stronger than my fear of failure/rejection/judgement.

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Your mid-year review

I love writing and journaling, so here are some of my favorite prompts to get you started on your own mid-year review.

You can answer them in your journal or click here to download a pretty workbook to print out (and get monthly love bombs and updates from me)!

What were the biggest lessons you’ve learned this year so far?

How have you grown?

What have you accomplished or completed?

What projects are still in the works?

What or who are you grateful for?

What were your favorite memories?

What do you want to grow or improve upon?

Where do you want to be by the end of the year?

How do you want to feel?

What can you do in order to feel that way now?

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And one last reminder. No matter where you are right now,

YOU ARE AMAZING

YOU ARE LOVED

YOU ARE ENOUGH

YOU ARE CHANGING THE WORLD!

xo Anna

an insider's guide to a live Beachbody event (The Platinum Edge 2015 recap!)

This past weekend I flew to Dallas for a training conference hosted by my coaching team.

I know. You're probably thinking "work trip? yawn," but let me tell you that when you're a Beachbody coach, boring, stuffy, awkward work trips are a thing of the past. They're replaced with epic adventures that turn your dreams into reality, introduce you to people who instantly feel like long-lost family, evaporate all your petty self doubts, fears, and insecurities, and make you feel capable of taking over the world.

So yeah.

This was another one of those trips where you know that your life has shifted or aligned (in a good way!), but you’re still not quite sure how the shift is going to work itself out...so I’m going to try to give myself time to marinate and reflect.

I'm buzzing full of ideas, inspiration, and grand schemes and plans for my team and business, but I know that I'm not going to be able to calm down and focus until I process all my feels with a long and rambly blog post.

So here we are.

This weekend was a big full-circle moment for me because it was the second time I’ve attended this particular conference, The Platinum Edge. Last year it was my first official live Beachbody event. I bought the ticket while I was still working full time and had only been coaching a few months. I had absolutely no idea what to expect and joked around with my old co-workers about going to a "fitness cult convention," but  I was blown open and filled with so much energy I wouldn’t shut up for weeks afterward (sorry Ben!).

You see, last year’s trip to Dallas ended up being one of the major turning points in my journey, the moment I truly knew I had found my purpose in life and realized exactly WHAT I was getting myself into with Team Beachbody and the bigger picture of what we do as coaches. I know that I'm going to continuously evolve, but I know for certain that I’m meant to share my story and help other women work towards becoming their best selves, and that Beachbody is the platform for me to make that happen.

If you want to see how far I’ve come in the past year, you can read my 2014 The Platinum Edge recap here. (Warning: extreme passion ahead…you may be inspired to take action on your dreams...you’ve been warned).

This year felt different because I have a year’s worth of perspective and experience, so I was able to relax and enjoy the trip a little more! I was mainly excited to get the chance to hang out with the seven coaches from my own team who joined me :)

We hadn’t all been together since our trip to Nashville in July for Coach Summit (the huge conference open to the entire Beachbody network), and I was also meeting one of my coaches in person for the very first time!

The power of social media to connect you with other women who share your exact same values, dreams, Meyers-Briggs personality (INFJ baby), and goals in life is pretty ridiculous, and I love explaining to people how I met my friends on Instagram. It’s kind of like love at first sight, or online dating for friends...you KNOW you’re meant to be together. You don’t have to spend time building a relationship because you already share so many similarities so you can immediately connect on an incredibly deep level.

My coach Sharayah lives in the Dallas area (this city confuses me so much, it’s like a vast sprawl of highways and sub-cities that are more satellites than suburbs), so I flew in Thursday to spend the night at her place.

We went straight from the airport to TJMaxx and Target for some shopping (priorities!) and then went into Dallas for dinner at HGSplyCo with one of her coaches, Shamira!

We split a delicious veggie and ginger hummus plate complete with bacon chips, then I ate an equally delicious Tex Mex bowl with pulled pork.

Sharayah and I stayed up way too late talking and hanging out, then got up early for a jog around the lake in her neighborhood. It was a perfect morning!

We spent Friday morning driving around the metropolis running errands and picking up food and supplies for the weekend, because apparently spending two nights in a resort means you need to be prepared for an Arctic expedition.

Then we finally made it to the Gaylord Resort to check in and meet up with the rest of our teammates before the conference sessions kicked off Friday afternoon!

Um, can we just talk about the Gaylord Texan for a sec? This place is crazy. It's like an indoor Texas-sized Christmas snowglobe.

Friday night Hannah, Katie and I grabbed cocktails at one of the resort bars (the Paloma is officially my new fave cocktail I discovered in Cabo!), then our bigger team hosted a pajama party...yup these are my people, and we crashed pretty early.

(There were 50 people in the hotel suite...my girls and I immeidately found our "introvert corner" hahaha).

Saturday was an early morning live TurboKick workout, and then a full day of sessions!

When you become a coach, you instantly become part of a network of teams, sort of like nested umbrellas or a big family tree. The team that I started is called Inspire Joy and we have about 140 coaches right now (as of November 2015), but we’re part of a larger team called ShredNation, which is then part of a massive team called Platinum Presenters. Platinum Presenters holds roughly ⅓ of all Team Beachbody coaches (there are approx 380,000 coaches in the entire network right now), and The Platinum Edge is our main event of the year. Still with me?

The great thing about a multi-level marketing business structure (which is NOT a pyramid scheme) is that everyone's on an equal playing field, no matter when you sign up. There's no ceiling or limit on the income you can earn or the success you can create for yourself, and so there’s no feeling of competition among Beachbody coaches. Our personal success only elevates the success of the entire network, so there’s a big culture of mentorship, sharing, training, teaching, duplication, and professional as well as personal development.

As my mentor Chelsea put it, "I felt like we were one big family and it was this feeling of, "I love what I do. You love it too? Here's what I do. Let's change the world together."

We got to hear from some of the top leaders in the network and basically hear their insider secrets to how they grew their businesses! Including Chelsea sharing her social media ninja strategies :)

Needless to say we were all pretty physically, emotionally and mentally drained by the end, so we gave ourselves an hour of “introvert downtime” to unwind before heading out to Sweet Tomatoes for an Inspire Joy dinner!

(My happy place!)

This was a surreal moment for me. Sweet Tomatoes is one of my favorite restaurants, and going there with a group of women (who also all love endless salads, baked goods, soft serve, and taking personality and Spirit Animal quizzes) who I didn’t even know 2 years ago was so much fun. Being able to find each other over the powers of the internet is kind of a miracle. This is how I feel whenever I meet a new client or future coach….like OMG another sister?? Where have you been all my life?

After eating way too many veggies, muffins, and soft serve, we went back to the resort and crashed early again.

Sunday we got up early for another live workout, PiYo with Chalene herself! This was the third time I’ve had the privilege of doing a PiYo class with Chalene and it’s pretty much my definition of happiness and joy.

The at-home version of PiYo is good, but it just doesn’t compare to the real deal, and I’ve been throwing around the idea of becoming PiYo certified ever since last year because it just feels too good not to share. Too many life goals...

After we finished sculpting our buns of steel, we went through our shower and Shakeology rotation and headed back for one last round of sessions to close out the conference! Sunday was probably my favorite day.

Chalene presented on using Periscope, and James Wedmore did an amazing YouTube training.

Sharing more videos is something that’s been on my mind a lot lately (and I LOVE learning and listening to presentations), so I was in my element!

I’ve officially started a (super awkward) channel on Periscope and am going to broadcast a video every single day, trial by fire style...feel free to download the app and follow me (annamarialocke)!

If there’s one thing I’ll say about Chalene, it’s that she is incredibly motivating and will get you to take action on pretty much anything, regardless of how terrified you are.

After the conference ended, I had a few hours before I had to catch my flight back to Chicago so I ended up just chilling and hanging out with three of my coaches who didn’t have to leave right away either. This was maybe my favorite moment of the whole trip, just chatting and decompressing, encouraging and inspiring each other to get after our plans and big ideas.

This fall I can tell I’ve been entering a new phase of my life and business, but I haven't been able to quite put my finger on what's changing. I’m letting go of a lot of my old fears and self doubts, and also facing a lot of resistance and insecurities in that process of release.

I do know that I’m exactly where I’m meant to be, and that big things are in store. I’m finally learning to be at peace with being a beginner, and not pressuring myself to instantly succeed (or beating myself up for moving slower than I think I “should” be).

I know for certain that the only thing holding me back is myself...but I’m not alone and I’m learning how to accept and receive help and support!

You aren’t alone either.

As coaches, we work for ourselves and it’s easy to feel alone when you’re stuck behind a screen, but when we have a chance to come together in real life it’s the most powerful experience.

(With the lady who sucked me into this madness, my gorgeous friend and coach Deidre! I can't believe I was so skeptical at first...it took me about 3 months of obsessive research to pull the trigger on coaching, can you believe it?)

Think about your secret dream or passion. I know you have one! You might not have ever share it with anyone because you’re afraid of sounding stupid or unrealistic...but think of that “too good to be true” vision for your life.

Now imagine being in a ballroom with 1000 people who not only share a similar version of that vision, but who are actively working on making it come true.

Are you with me?

Yup, it’s pretty powerful.

I wouldn’t say I feel unstoppable now, but I do feel completely aligned, confident, and supported with where I’m at and where I’m going.

Becoming a coach sounds scary, until you just do it and realize that it’s not a big leap at all.

It’s simply a small step into the person you were meant to be all along, and our team is here to welcome you with open arms (and maybe a crazy workout or Paloma).

xo Anna

You can learn more about coaching with Inspire Joy here! If you have any questions, please send me an email! There’s no such thing as a stupid question. I love sharing my experiences as a coach and would love to hear your story too :)

Beachbody does not guarantee any level of success or income from the Team Beachbody Coach Opportunity. Each Coach's income depends on his or her own efforts, diligence, and skill. See our Statement of Independent Coach Earnings located at https://images.beachbody.com/coach-office/downloads/statement_of_independent_coach_earnings.pdf for the most recent information on our Coaches' actual incomes.